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Julie is on the blog!

It is 6 am.  On my day off.  And I’m awake.  So let’s blog!

Do you all miss Dani as much as I do?  Seriously.  Things just aren’t the same.  1 – Getting lunch at Panera by yourself is not as fun as having lunch with your BFF.  2 – I have no gorgeous pictures to wake up to every morning.  3 – Where was she yesterday when I needed her for my weekly crisis?!?!  She kept asking me, “What are you going to blog about?”  And I kept saying, “Don’t worry – something will happen that I can blog about.”  And it did.

Let me preface this story with a few things.  1 – For the past 6 months I have been chairing a committee for the 2011 Annual Ebenezer UMC Holly Mart event.  It is my church’s biggest event of the year, an amazing fundraiser, a huge tradition and, honestly, I was honored that they asked me to chair it this year.  While I LOVE a good challenge, this has been the center of my stress and agony for the past 183 days and I could not be more excited that tomorrow is the big event.  Saturday, November 12th – Ebenezer UMC – Woodbine Road, Winfield, MD – 8:30 am – 2 pm.  In case you ALL want to come.  2 – Failing is not really my thing.  I’m still upset about that B+ in Spanish Conversation class.  It’s been seven years.  3 – The women on this committee have huge expectations that I am expected to live up to.  There is no learning curve.  There is no room for mistakes.  This has been made very clearly.  And I assume there are consequences, but I don’t even want to know what they are.  4 – I have a list of a few things I’m petrified of.  I’m not talking snakes, spiders, etc.  I’m talking things that every person in life should know about/know how to do/know how to handle and they fact that I don’t, and know that one day I’ll have to, scares me to no end.

So as chair of the Holly Mart, I am in charge of the start-up cash.  Logical to me:  the person who handles the books will give me cash, I will divvy into cash boxes.  Logical to the church:  the person in charge of the books writes me a check, which I have to take to the bank and cash into specific denominations and then bring it back and divvy into cash boxes.

What actually happened:  Last Sunday I get the check.  I probably should have taken it to the bank on Monday and dealt with cashing it, but instead I waited.  Because while it probably isn’t that much money to most people, I just didn’t want to have this much cash in my possession for more than a day.  Event on Saturday – bank on Friday.  Um.  No.  Friday is a holiday, which means banks are closed.  Bank on Thursday.  I realized this Thursday at about 12 noon.  So I leave work in Frederick at 3:30 pm.  I have a bank in Frederick, but its locations are so inconvenient.  So I decide to go to my husband’s bank.  Embarrassing fact #1 – I don’t know that bank account number.  Who doesn’t know their bank account number??  Fail.  I get to the bank.  Walk up to the door.  IT IS CLOSED.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME.  ITS 3:44 PM.  Oh. My. Goodness.  I can see the disappointment in their eyes.  You can’t have an event without start-up cash.  The event will fail.  There will be consequences.  Holy cow.

Then I look to my left and I see that the drive through windows are open.  Okay people.  Here we go.  Embarrassing fact #2 – I have NEVER gone through the drive through window of a bank.  And it is on the list.  I remember my friends in high school going through the drive through window.  How in the world am I a 27 year old, successful career woman, married with a kid, but I have NO CLUE what to do??  Fail.  I am sweating.  My heart is pounding.  I’m having a legit mini anxiety attack.  Call mom.  Mom is not only shocked that I have no clue how to go through the drive through, but is clearly concerned that there will be no start-up cash.  Gotta love mom.  “Julie.  Get in the drive through line.  Now.  Before that closes, too.”  I’m almost in tears.  TEARS people.  Then my mom says, “Remember there are cameras on you, Julie.  Don’t look nervous.”  O.M. G.  That was not helpful.  Pull in drive through.  I’m second in line.  I call my husband to continue freaking out.  Repeat shock and concern, add some mockery.  I’m MORTIFIED.  Call my sister.  Repeat shock, concern, mockery, add the reminder that there will be consequences and I have to figure this out immediately.  So I pull up to the thing.  You know.  The sucker thing.  What is that thing even called?  So I put the check in the sucker thing and send it through.  Tell the woman I need specific denominations.  She says no problem.  Okay – this isn’t so bad.  “I need $250 in ones.”  Worst response ever – “I only have $50 in ones.”  FAIL.  “Okay, I’ll take it.  I need $100 in fives.”  Best response ever – “I can do that.”  PRAISE THE LORD.  AT LEAST WE HAVE FIVES.  “I need quarters.”  New worst response ever – “I can’t send coins.”  Duh.  Of course she can’t send coins.  I am an idiot.  I ask for the rest in $20s and guess I’ll have to figure something out.  So I pull away.  I am $200 short on ones and have NO COINS.  The event is going to FAIL.  Think of a plan, Julie, think of a plan.  I’ll go to another bank.  Can I go to another bank?  Even if I don’t have an account?  I’m not cashing or depositing, I’m exchanging.  So I can go to another bank, right?   Repeat mini-anxiety attack.  I pull five hundred feet across the parking lot to another bank.  Praise the Lord, again.  Their lobby is open.  I walk in, remembering not to look nervous (thanks, mom).  This nice woman, I think she had angel wings, exchanges my money with no problem.

This people – this is WINNING!  Have start-up cash.  Have not disappointed.  Still avoiding the consequences.  Am never going through the drive through window again.  It is still on the list.

I am off to finish setting up for this amazing event!  Let the holiday season begin!


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