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Fears

The idea that being afraid of anything, admitting regrets or fears is a weakness. We worked so hard to become leaders and college grads and social media mavens that we forgot it’s okay to say ‘Hey! Life is scary! Look at me, talk to me, I’m so scared I want to crawl into bed with a bottle of rum”. Somewhere along the line, admitting to being scared turned into a weakness. Any sign of worry was a red flag that part of your life was less than stellar and maybe you should talk to someone about that. Tough stopped being about being brave enough to recognize your fears and tough became never having fears.

After wedding season is over and I am in the lull of winter time, I find the idea of “WOOOHOOO!! LOOK AT HOW BRAVE I AM AS I TACKLE EVERY OBSTACLE IN MY WAY! I CAN DO IT ALL AND REGRET NOTHING! WATCH AS I CONQUER THE WORLD WITH PINTEREST ENVIABLE CLOTHES, SHAMPOO COMMERCIAL HAIR, MY GORGEOUS HUSBAND/FIANCE/BOYFRIEND/RIDICULOUSLY CUTE DOG AND STRUT EVERYDAY TO MY SOUL FULFILLING JOB!”,  really f-ing exhausting. And because I’m exhausted and this whole year has had many of my fears plow me down, curb stomp me and threaten to give me a mullet – I’ve decided to share with you a few things I’m currently afraid of. I hope it prompts you to do the same. And more importantly – I hope it prompts you to share what you are scared of without feeling scared about sharing. I’m starting to sound weird. Let’s get started.

1. People judging my grammar. Isn’t that ridiculous? I know I write this blog solely for me (and for you all too, I guess, 🙂 ) and I write without stopping, editing or reviewing, which means each post is filled with errors. I know this. I try to roll my eyes at such a trivial insecurity but so many of you are grammar all-stars that I cringe thinking about you mentally noting each misused oxford comma. (And because I admitted this fear, you will now all search for grammatical errors. I KNOW HOW THIS GAME WORKS.)

2.  Being boring. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to be like Jersey Shore crazy – but the idea of being dull is one of my greatest fears. Sure, I usually spend my weeknights playing wordfeud (hi! we should play together, I’m addicted, still) while watching Chopped or reruns of Say yes to the Dress and editing – but I DO IT WITH STYLE.

3. Skiing – or anything really where I have to go downhill really fast unrestrained. Sledding.

4.  Deer. I can’t explain it. Or maybe I can. I am not only scared they are going to dart out in front of my car, I am also just scared of them looking at me. Nevermind, I can’t explain it.

5. Saying no. Or doing less. Or both of those things together. I need to seriously get over my fears of saying no. Like… right now.

So there you have it. I admitted to deer, skiing and not being able to say no. What are you afraid of?

  • January 13, 2012 - 1:30 pm

    Scott - I agree with the deer. Something about how they look at you as your are driving past them at night and the light hits their crazt deer eyes. Yikes!

  • January 13, 2012 - 8:49 pm

    shanna - A few thoughts:
    1) You are my hero.
    2) I also TOTALLY get the deer thing because that’s EXACTLY how I feel about goats, except not the smashing into my car part because they don’t do that (DO THEY?!?), but the looking at me in my eyes part. It totally freaks me the freak out.
    3) My biggest fear (for real, serious) is not finding (or having the courage to go after) my soul-fulfilling job. I “like” my job, and I’m grateful to have a good one, but does it fulfill my soul? Would I do it if I wasn’t getting paid? Unlikely. (Which is putting it nicely)
    4) People who are overly concerned about/critical of grammar are insecure and total b-holes. Ignore them.

    xoxo

  • January 13, 2012 - 9:24 pm

    Brian - So, I am neither a grammar all-star or (see?) overly concerned or critical about it, but I do have to say that misspellings and/or errors do trouble me WHEN the author is attempting to persuade me or teach me something that they think I ought to know. I notice this more frequently because a lot of “new media”ish news sources – particularly ones that are “streaming” “content” to my “apps” – are full of errors because the authors are writing stories on their phones in Starbucks wi-fi zones. And I wonder, should I really trust your opinion on Ron Paul’s chances in South Carolina when you couldn’t or wouldn’t check your spelling? For the purposes of this blog, this is neither here nor there. But that’s my unsolicited opinion and that’s what blogs are for. Also, I’ve had a few drinks. And so has my wife, so her comments about grammar b-holes are null and void. That is all.

  • January 13, 2012 - 9:28 pm

    Brian - Also, my wife says that my previous comment was a b-hole comment if she ever heard one. But she is drunk, so whatever. But seriously, ever since this lady took awesome pictures at our wedding I have been checking out her blog semi-regularly, and it’s pretty awesome.

  • January 14, 2012 - 10:11 am

    Dani Leigh - Oh wow, I think that was my most favorite thing ever, Shanna and Brian.

  • January 14, 2012 - 10:35 am

    shanna - P.S. For the record, I was not drunk when I posted my comment, unlike some people I know. 😛

    <3

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